45 Hours

Every time I get ready to pick up where I left off with my “reality show” of cancer segments, something else happens that just begs to be written about instead.  I swear I’m not doing this on purpose.  I’m going to now tell you a story which will make you cringe, laugh, possibly cry, and hopefully be thankful and count your blessings that this isn’t your life.

Thursday April 16, 2015

If you remember back to one of my previous blogs, Shit Happens, I mentioned my birthday coming up and how I wasn’t feeling that well.  On top of that, my best friend that was suppose to visit that weekend from North Carolina ended up having a house full of sick people so she had to cancel her trip.  It was ok though, we made it work just like we always do.  She rescheduled her trip, no one in her house was sick and she was due to arrive on this night.

Vicki’s here!  This is me commenting on the thickness of her hair.

Words can’t express how excited I was for our girls weekend!  Do you have that friend where you can just talk and talk about you don’t even know what but yet the hours float by?  It’s quite amazing really.  She’s been my best friend since we were in middle school and nothing has changed.  We stayed up until about 11:30 (way past our bed times) and called it a night for the next day was going to be a busy one.

Friday April 17, 2015

I had today all planned out.  We started by getting our nails done at the Marilyn Monroe Spa on Mills.

Interestingly enough, since cancer introduced itself into my life, I have loved pampering myself more now than ever.  Something as little and simple as having my nails painted makes me smile.  Clearly don’t have the money to get regular manis and pedis so I do my own mostly.  I feel it’s important to always be the best representation of yourself that you can be.  Not fake.  Just take pride in your beauty and flaunt it.  You only live once.

Ok, got off track there for a minute.  Girls Day.  Yes, my wonderful mother/caregiver was with us the whole day and I wouldn’t have it any other way.  (Dr.’s orders plus I can’t drive just yet.)  We go over to Park Ave and eat at Paris Bistro.  I highly recommend this restaurant.  If for nothing else, the ambiance alone.  We sat on the inside/outside portion right at the tree and it was just perfect.

Lots of walking, browsing, shopping, going in some stores – looking at prices – and immediately leaving said stores, and the best of all which was spending quality time with two of my favorite ladies in the world. Alright, it’s been a long day and we were lucky that it was a good day for me.  I lasted up until 4pm!  Went home, had dinner, and laughed our asses off to the movie ‘Horrible Bosses.’  What a great day.

Saturday April 18, 2015 – “Well that escalated quickly.” Ron Burgundy.  Smart man.

I woke up feeling a bit tired and nauseated.  However, this is a norm for me so I didn’t pay much attention at first.  After breakfast I decided to take a nap to see if that would help me feel better.  Two hours later I wake up.  Nope, no better.  Felt worst actually.  “Oh no…I’m going to have to cancel our reservations at my favorite restaurant, Hillstone, and just stay in all day.  Ugh, why is this happening with my best friend here?!”  Of course she was understanding and we were just going to make the most of it indoors all day.  I only wish that is where the story ended.

Everything happened so quickly.  It was different from all the other times I’ve been sick this past year and a half.  I started vomiting around noon and couldn’t stop.  That was followed by diarrhea…while still vomiting.  I could no longer hold my own head up or walk.  I could barely talk.  I was going in and out of consciousness.  If all that isn’t scary enough, my eyes started rolling in the back of my head which made everyone freak out.  You have to remember, my immune system is still weak so whatever this was it was very hard for my body to fight.  I’m the furthest thing from a normal person right now.

I’m in an ambulance 

You can ask anyone in my family, I will do anything to get out of having to go to the hospital.  They’ve tried taking me when we’ve had scares in the past and I didn’t allow it.  This day, after my eyes rolled backwards, I managed to mutter the word “ambulance.”  It’s 3pm.  Scott, my husband, made his first 911 call ever and they were there within 4 minutes.  It was crazy.  I was still on the toilet, crying, I hadn’t had a shower since the morning before, and I was scared.  I should mention that while on the toilet, my mother was having to hold me completely up so that I wouldn’t hit my head on the back or slide off the toilet.  My body was totally limp and I was pretty much passed out while sitting there.  On a funny note though, I later found out that my mother was asking for someone to hand her a wet wipe.  My husband handed her the canister of clorox wipes instead.  You can imagine what she needed a wipe for therefore when she noticed what he was handing her, she slapped out of his hand and corrected him in the nicest/frantic way possible.  Ok, back to the story.  I felt like the only thing that could help me were the fluids that they would get in me immediately.  Did you know that a firetruck always comes along with the paramedics?

They really strap you in.

There were at least 6-8 emergency people on site, mostly muscular men.  (Hey, I could barely keep my eyes open but they were at eye level with all these muscular arms carrying me around.  I noticed.)  They wheel me out in an awkward looking wheelchair then put me on a stretcher in front of my house.  People watching?  I didn’t care, last thing on my mind.  They put an iv in me as soon as I get in the ambulance and start the fluids.  We’re on our way.  Is this really happening??

This is just terrible…remember how Vicki had to cancel her trip last month?  Well she felt bad she missed my birthday so while I was napping before the horrible chain of events that followed, she decorated my dining room and had a gift waiting for me.  I was suppose to have a cupcake, blow out my candle, unwrap my gift, and celebrate my birth this day.  Needless to say, none of that happened and this is what stayed in our house for the days that followed while I was in the hospital.  As my husband put it, saddest birthday party ever.  We just were not mean’t to celebrate my birthday together this year!    

ER

Well, here I am.  Back in the hospital.  The paramedic that did my iv overheard me tell my allergies to a nurse.  He then proceeded to tell me that the main bandage over my iv on my right arm is tegaderm, which is one of the allergies I have.  Great.  We’ll see how that looks in a few days.  I’m now in a temporary room in the ER.  They take my blood to start many blood tests, chest x-ray, EKG, abdominal ultrasound, and those are just the tests I remember.  I was still out of it for the most part.  And so cold…bone chilling cold.  Due to the fluids and dehydration I guess.  At one point, I had 8 blankets on me.  It was 7pm and I started to feel better.  I was hungry and so very thirsty.  Both good signs.  Scott went to the cafeteria to get us dinner and I fell asleep once again.  I wake up at 8pm.  No food, no water, no nurse, and no husband.  The bed I was in didn’t have a nurse button and I couldn’t find the controller.  I was physically stuck.  I started saying “help.”  I kept getting louder, well as loud as my weak voice could go.  I kept that up for 20 minutes before I wiggled out of bed almost unhooking my lines.  Of course by the time my husband gets there with food, my nurse shows up.  Thanks a lot guys.

Transitional CTU or as I like to call it:  Purgatory

No TV…Really??!

Scott leaving. My thoughts, “All by myself.  I don’t wanna be …all by myself anymore.”

I took this picture as soon as I walked in the house.  This is what I look like after the last 45 hours.  So confused, disappointed, and sad.